A blog intensifying the flavor of life and toasting those who share in the feast, rather than settling for a dry, plain, melba toast existence.

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

superhero powers

"If you could have one superhero power, which one would you choose and why?" could be an icebreaker question. Children, who think they ARE superheroes, do well with this sort of exercise. The rest of us search our brains for images of caped crusaders, and those with well-kept aliases that enable the superheroes to blend in with society until needed.

I used to think it would be an awesome superhero power to become invisible. Like the character, Violet, who was the daughter in the movie The Incredibles, I thought it would be fun to have the ability to literally "blend" into the wallpaper. She could listen to what others would say about her when they thought she was no longer with them. She could spy on people to see what they would do behind her back. On the surface this power seems to be the greatest thing ever. The reality of living it out, however, is something quite different.

Desiring to be unnoticed may be the dream of an awkward adolescent girl but as one gets older it is nice to be recognized. It makes one feel good to receive a compliment about a change in appearance. Always wondering whether or not I am presenting myself well, it is helpful to get a little feedback once in awhile. Blending in no longer holds much of an appeal. Distinguishing oneself is preferred.

In the workplace it is wonderful to be seen as competent. An evaluation is sufficient but a kind word goes much further. If what we do does not seem to matter, then why do it? Again, who wants to be invisible when those who stand out are the ones most people are attracted to?

Being left out is not exactly the same as being invisible, but it hurts just as much. When I'm left out I wonder if by chance those superhero powers kicked in, making me invisible without me even knowing it. Then I have to analyze the scenario to figure out if my being left out was intentional or not. If I was not meant to be left out, then all is well. If I was, then why? If there is no explanation about being left out, then I become invisible. Even superhero powers have flaws.

A child will become angry when ignored by another child and demand to know the reason. Grown-ups are supposed to act in ways more becoming. But instead they usually do not say anything. They go about their lives pretending that they are perfectly visible and if someone cannot "see" them it is that other person's fault and not their own. They withdraw and find ways to soothe themselves.

Yesterday, after feeling like I had somehow tapped into the amazing superhero power of invisibility, I went to the pool and did laps until I was out of breath. I came home and created a pasta sauce from scratch that tasted delicious. I had dinner with my family. And for the first time that day, I became visible again.







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